The Surprising Health Benefits of Swallowing Semen
If you can stomach it, add some cum into your diet.
The single mom wears a blue sports bra as she films the experiment, her midriff exposing part of a tattoo that looks vaguely — and appropriately — phallic. The cum she’s about to eat came from her friend who “created” it about an hour earlier. Their relationship, she assures viewers, is completely platonic. In fact, her friend has been supplying her with it for about a year now, ever since she tried using semen as a face mask. It’s worked wonders on her skin, improving her complexion, softening her texture, and reducing the appearance of wrinkles. No wonder she wants to try eating it now, too.
Kiss ladles a spoonful of the cum from a glass bowl and gives it a tentative whiff. “It smells kind of like old books,” she says. “And chlorine.”
Then she tilts her head back and drips the jizz straight down her throat. She swallows, her eyebrows furrow, and she smacks her lips a few times. “That is surprisingly salty,” she says after a pause. “It has a kind of tang to it that goes to the back of the mouth. It really soaks into the tongue.” She equates it to when you reach the bottom of a bag of popcorn. “It’s really intense like that.”
Since Kiss posted “The Benefits of Drinking Semen” to YouTube in November of 2016, more than 1.8 million people have watched her eat spunk. Many of them still can’t comprehend why she would do it, but some are starting to recognize that she might be onto something. As one YouTuber wrote in the comments section, “Who knew I'm a walking vitamin store.”
Kiss might be one of the more vocal proponents of the health benefits of semen, but tons of people already swallow during sex. The difference is, they’re not taking shots of it every morning or baking it into their cookies. Cum-eating evangelists keep containers of semen in their refrigerators and blog about cooking with it. The publishing industry has even taken note: You can find not one, but two semen recipe books for sale on Amazon.
So, if not for the decidedly funky taste, what’s the appeal? Though normally sopped up with tissues or contained neatly inside of a condom, semen is full of healthy compounds that can help strengthen and protect the body. It’s been used for over a thousand years to improve one’s health, vitality, intelligence, reproductive organs, and mental wellbeing.
Around 100 A.D., the Borborites, a group of ancient Christians, began practicing “sexual sacramentalism” in their rituals. They’d eat semen as a Eucharist and drank from cups of menstrual blood, believing them to be the body and blood of Christ. They also ate fetuses. Unsurprisingly, their name translates in Greek to “filthy ones.” A rare sect of Japanese Buddhists practiced ritual semen eating, too, believing sperm to be a “vital essence drop” that the body needs. Students ate their master’s sperm as a means of their transmitting the other’s skills.
Today, some of semen’s surprising health benefits have been backed up by science. Semen is high in protein and low in fat, and contains only about one to five calories per tablespoon. It has relatively few health risks other than giving you diarrhea — just make sure you’re not allergic and your source doesn’t have STDs. Experienced spooge-eaters equate it to milk or eggs, which can also be consumed fresh from the body. They say it’s like “having a yogurt.” Also, of course, it’s free, so why, as one cum connoisseur pointed out, would you let your “natural harvest” go to waste?
For now, you can’t buy semen at the grocery store. But that could change when people start realizing its superfood potential. Here are six reasons why you should enjoy a nice spoonful of jizz with your next meal.
6 Health Benefits of Swallowing Semen
Semen doesn’t have to taste bad
What you eat impacts what your semen tastes like. On the one hand, you can positively impact the flavor by eating foods such as celery or parsley, which sweeten the “seminal palette.” On the other hand, it means that basically everything else you eat will make it taste astringent, or like shit.
Over the years, Kiss has learned about the variabilities of eating cum, and how certain foods can enhance or ruin the taste of her friend’s tri-weekly batches.
“Every batch tastes different, depending on what he’s been eating,” she told Metro in 2016. “If he’s been drinking alcohol or eaten something particularly pungent, like asparagus, I ask him to give me a heads up so I know not to drink it neat. Things like pineapple and peppermint make it taste better, but I’ll happily take it straight off a spoon usually.”
If shooting straight semen seems too hardcore, you can ease yourself into the world with particular recipes. Paul "Fotie" Photenhauer, an author in the San Francisco Bay Area, has published two books on eating semen, either by incorporating it into food or cocktails.
You can mix it with butter, cottage cheese, and eggs to create “creamy cum crepes” or mask it with barbeque sauce and use it as a marinade for a chicken or meat dish. Desserts, with their high sugar contents and rich flavors, are great at concealing the taste of semen. Caramel sauces, cream fillings, and chocolate puddings lend themselves well to a drizzle or two of cum.
It blends well as a cocktail mixer because the liquor numbs the palette and dilutes some of the semen’s bitterness. Add it to a mojito for a hint of creaminess or to a cognac for some zest. Pro tip: Let the semen melt for a few minutes before adding it to a drink so that it’s easier to mix in. If it’s “unusually thick,” you can dilute it with a few drops of water.
Eating semen boosts your energy
The next time you’re feeling tired, slurp some sperm instead of a cup of coffee or an energy drink. One teaspoon of semen contains more than 200 types of proteins, as well as a range of vitamins and minerals responsible for giving us energy, including vitamin C, calcium, chlorine, vitamin B12, potassium, sodium, magnesium, and zinc. It’s an especially good additive for vegans, as their diets may be lacking sufficient vitamin B12. The amounts of each compound vary depending on the person’s diet and age, but you can generally count on most jizz to have solid levels of proteins and zinc.
Kiss said that before she started eating semen, she’d often feel “run down” and low energy. After starting her daily cum diet, the 31-year-old is more physically active than ever before. She now spends the majority of her time working out, posting regular gym selfies and bodybuilding progress pics to Instagram using the hashtag #bodytransformation.
Eating semen fights depression
Only 3 percent of the thick white stuff contains sperm; the rest is made up of seminal fluid, which consists mostly of water chock-full of compounds. In addition to sugars, vitamins, minerals, immunosuppressants, and, oddly, two female sex hormones, semen also contains a number of mood-elevating compounds, including endorphins, oxytocin, and serotonin.
In a study involving 293 female college students in Albany, New York, researchers found that those who had sex without condoms had fewer symptoms of depression than those who used prophylactics. The reason? Semen. By allowing the vagina to absorb cum, the women were supercharging their bodies with uplifting nutrients that ultimately put them in better moods.
If having regular, unprotected sex sounds like too risky of a move for you, eating semen comes in handy: As long as you know that the source of your spunk is STD-free, you can get the same health benefits from semen without the possibility of pregnancy.
Eating semen may make you smarter
There are claims all over the internet about how eating semen can raise your intelligence level. Science hasn’t yet officially proved this, but Mensa inadvertently has.
Earlier this year, the intelligence organization tested the IQ of a UCLA student who had been drinking sperm for 13 months. Alicia Franklin reportedly achieved a score that was 65 points higher than the one she’d started with. She credited the jizz-eating for improving her cognitive intelligence, perception, and memory.
The other good news? You don’t have to drink sperm for 13 months for the affects to set in. Franklin said she started feeling smarter within two weeks of taking the “superfood.”
Eating semen can help you snooze
Forget about drinking a glass of warm milk if you’re having trouble hitching a ride to Dream Land; just sip on some ejaculate. In addition to feel-good, happiness-inducing compounds, semen also contains melatonin, a hormone that regulates when we sleep and when we are awake. Our bodies naturally produce it every day, releasing greater quantities when it’s dark outside and less when it’s light.
People who are jet lagged or having trouble sleeping often take over-the-counter melatonin supplements to help them zonk out. You could do that and spend $10 on 60 pills, or you could just eat semen. Couple that with the energy required to create sperm (either yours or someone else’s) and you’re guaranteed a good night’s rest.
Eating semen might reduce miscarriages
Jizz contains antigens, which induce an immune response when absorbed or ingested in the body. At least two studies have found that antigens can also help protect unborn fetuses in the womb, ultimately preventing pregnancy complications including miscarriages and infant death.
In recent research published in the Journal of Reproductive Immunology, scientists found a correlation between a woman’s ability to get pregnant and how much oral sex she performed. The more blow jobs she gave, the less likely she was to lose the child or develop health issues, such as preeclampsia.
More studies still need to be done on eating semen, but the research thus far is encouraging. If doing so can create healthier wombs and more successful pregnancies, then it’s almost a no-brainer. Don’t just eat cum for yourself; do it for your unborn child.